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Depending on your tolerance for toilet humour, this is either a gem, or the last thing you’ll read on this blog.

The Australian Government’s Department of Health & Ageing maintains a National Public Toilet Map at . You can search for a convenient convenience by postcode, address, nearby landmark or map reference. Or you can just browse. I swear to you, there is a “Browse” button.

Presumably when you’re busting for the toilet, you can still spare the time to find an internet connection.

The Public Toilet Map website is professional and thorough. Kudos to whoever’s behind it (no pun). A lot of higher-profile websites could take a leaf from its book, or tear off a sheet; for example, Vodafone Australia’s ugly, broken and misspelled website, which should by rights be added to the map.

And of course, there are people to whom this is far from a laughing matter. There are worlds within worlds.

But getting back to the toilet humour, here are my favourite elements of the National Public Toilet Map:

1. The site invites to you “Visit other sites about continence”. I didn’t, but thanks. I wonder if it’s part of a web ring?

2. There’s also a link inviting you to “Visit our Help section for assistance”. The mind boggles.

3. If you find a public toilet that’s not listed, you can add it to the database by clicking a link labelled “Suggest a toilet”. This leads to an online form that concludes with a button labelled “Suggest Toilet”: possibly my favourite internet button ever.

4. There’s a section called “My Toilet Map”. When you mouse over the link, the pop-up tip says “Save your favourite toilets, searches and plans”.

5. There’s a public toilet newsletter you can subscribe to. I signed up on behalf of a mate.





  1. I love it! It’s hilarious. I do think some people have way too much time on their hands though. 🙂 By the way, you better not have subscribed to the toilet news letter on my behalf, Mr.! :p

    • happenstance
    • Posted Sunday, 30 September, 2007 at 3:11 pm
    • Permalink
    • Reply

    Reading your toilet story gave me the sudden urge to use ‘the facilities’ myself. I don’t think it was because of your writing style though.
    I’m a 303 Student myself – good bog, er, I mean, blog. :0)

  2. Thanks! Yours was the first response from a fellow student. This sudden encouragement might even prompt me to write a few new posts.

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